Christmas Eve after dark

Thoughts from a pew

Well not really. I bring my own seat.

Do you see what I see?

The nativity is beautiful. But the straw is still just a fake cover on a cardboard box, so I can’t steal any.

Do you hear what I hear?

Reciting 3 Hail Marys before the opening hymn. Are we mocking the Holy Trinity? Should we actually be having an exorcism?

Not repeating hallelujah 7 times after the second reading. Because I might start singing the newest version by Small Town Titans. And singing about David & sex might get me kicked out.

Do you know what I know?

Those gold chalices that hold Communion are so cool. Maybe I can buy my dogs’ gold food bowls, so they can be styling?

Offering each other the sign of peace via a handshake and going up to receive Communion and Wine from the priest must be an introvert’s version of Hell.

And Satan’s only faintly here this year. (read about last year’s encounter here) Must be a good omen. I really need to watch that show. Maybe I can binge it this weekend?