The Making Of A(n) Info-Murderer

I created an infomercial for my book, The Grumpy Grammarian’s Guide To Copy Editing

And I killed it.

Let me set the stage for you:

I entered the infomercial dark web and analyzed psychological triggers that influence people’s decisions like a small-town detective trying to pin a murder on an innocent person. 

I summoned my inner Billy Mays with just one huff of OxiClean and practiced my lines in a booming voice like the locals voicing their destain for the small-town detective. 

“But wait!”
“1 easy payment of $9.99!”
“It slices, it dices, it never loses its edge!”

And I gathered my costars & followed them around tossing dog treats & fruit snacks while filming like I was making a documentary about a murder. 

An infomercial murder. 

Because it’s both horrifyingly good and bad. And I love it as much as a lonely inmate loves a penpal.

But the shining moment of my infomercial is my niece talking about my book unscripted.

I may or may not have promised to make slime with her on Saturday in exchange for a positive review. Which is hysterical because she’s never read my book. 

She’s so good I’m thinking about nicknaming her One Take Tompkins. She just might have a future in acting. 

Watch my infomercial here

P.S. You can buy my book here.